On the Couch with Lea DeLaria

Lea DeLaria AAR On the CouchWho is Lea DeLaria?
Lea DeLaria is actually Amelia Earhart. Mystery solved!

What Would you do differently to what you do now?
I would not buy that fucking high tech Nest Smoke Alarm. The damn thing goes off in the middle of the night for no reason waking my poor neighbors. Today it started beeping and chirping, “attention batteries are low.” Seriously? I changed the damn batteries three weeks ago. It wouldn’t stop. Their tech-support was useless, so I ripped it out of the ceiling and threw it away. Right now I can actually hear it beeping outside my window in the garbage. I would rather hire an anonymous homeless man to sit in my kitchen and tell me, “I smell smoke!”

Who inspires you and why?
Anybody who can open a jar for me.

What would you do to make a different in the world?
I would always be who I am, an out Butch Dyke with no fucks to give, speaking against societal bullshit… wait, I do that now!

Favorite holiday destination and why?
Provincetown, Massachusetts is a magical place filled with great restaurants, stunning beaches, and even huge sand dunes. There are shows to be seen and historical sites… if that’s your thing. If you go, you must eat at Front Street. Have the lamb! Sorry Playboy Channel, Front Street has the best rack.

When friends come to town, what attraction would you take them to, and why?
I take people to the Staten Island ferry, which is free and sails you right by the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island. If you time it correctly on the return trip, you can see the sunset over Manhattan. Also, they serve great Hebrew National 1/4 pound all beef hot dogs and ice cold beer.

What are you currently reading?
I am currently reading these questions. I kid! I Kid! I happen to be rereading A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole, my favorite book.

What are you currently listening to?
Obsessed with Donald Glover at the moment. OBSESSED!

Happiness is?
An 8 ball and a couple of hookers.

What does the future hold for you?
Fuck the future, live in the moment, the here in the now.

Lea DeLaria breaks out from her Big Boo role in a spectacular blend of comedy and song at the Melbourne Recital Centre (7 June); and City Recital Hall, Sydney (9 June); before heading to the Adelaide Cabaret Festival (11 June). For more information, visit: www.leadelaria.com for details.

Image: Lea DeLaria (supplied)